Chicken Crap

Color Fields, 2006, Oil on Panel, 8x10







I have been spending too much time on the computer lately. Despite making a promise to myself each day that I will not. But sometimes it really pays off.

Recently while doing a blog search for "bare spots on chicken back" (I eventually came to the conclusion that the roosters are being um, too rough during their amorous attentions) I came across several interesting chicken blogs. Well they're interesting if you have chickens, that is. heh. One of them had a suggestion for something that would keep chickens busy - hang a cabbage in their coop and they would go crazy pecking at it. It spins, is edible of course and eventually it will burst into a show tune and encourage the chickens to do a line dance. Just kidding. At the grocery store, the other day, I bought some cabbage heads. Because color is an important part of my life, I decided on the purple cabbages. Why put up the ordinary green cabbages for the chickens when I have the option to hang a beautiful cabbage with colors that change with the light?

So yesterday I put it up. The chickens were wary at first, but eventually one of them made contact. Then they all dug in. A few hours later I went back out to collect eggs and saw that the cabbage had completely disappeared. Then I noticed their poop. Big chunks of the most gorgeous, colorful chicken shit ever.

Grumbacher's Magnesium Green. I am not kidding. A stunning combination of cerulean blue and chromium green with a little cap of flake white. And so today I am off to work in the studio and I will be adding magnesium green to my palette just to see what happens.

More Structures

I'm still working each day in order to finish up the paintings for the show coming up in January. You can see info about the show here. Scroll down to the bottom.

I am trying to do a variety of landscapes, and landscapes that include structures, such as barns. However, lately I am really feeling uninspired about the regular landscapes. I have to really work to get a landscape out of me these days, and the failure rate is rising on those. I am finding myself much more intrigued with painting the barns, and I am also interested in adding houses. When we took our recent trip to NH, I took numerous photographs of the big, square boxy houses near downtown Portsmouth. Yesterday, I did several underpaintings which superimposed those buildings into a rather stark background. It's kind of risky to be experimenting with imagery so close to a deadline for a show, but the structures aren't so far off from the barns that I have been doing for the last year or so. In fact, they are quite similar.

This feels like a natural, yet still exciting direction for me to take. Probably the timing isn't so good. However, if they fail miserably, I have enough work completed, or nearly completed for the show. The challenge for me with painting houses (well, anything for that matter) is to not get too busy with all of the details. While that is my tendency, the more simple imagery and treatment is generally more successful. Actually, I think it's the struggle to balance the two that is successful.

I am putting up the new underpaintings. The houses are the single image on the easel, and the bottom piece in the stacked pieces in the other photo, which also includes a landscape and a barn. At this point the houses and the barns are almost interchangeable, but I will try to take them in somewhat different directions at the color stage.

Well, that's the goal, anyway. There is an equally good chance that I'll end up adding a few more panels to the sand down pile.

Lady Ostapeck

Lady Ostapeck














When we moved here about three years ago, I couldn't help but notice a very "unique" home on the road to town. The house was extremely run down, sagging and unkept. The yard was filled with junk. Chipped statues, segments of iron fencing, spray painted wicker furniture, etc. But there was a bit of whimsy about it all and I couldn't help but look for new items every time I drove by. After awhile, I learned that the woman who lived in the house was Lady Ostapeck. I had already heard much about her as she had recently turned 85 and the whole town had a party for her. There were many articles about in the local papers and I certainly thought she seemed interesting, if a bit eccentric.

Later on that winter, I had several dreams which included her and so I took that as a sign that I was supposed to know her. One snowy Sunday in March, I made some cookies and went over to meet her. She immediately invited me in and the minute I walked in the door, I was in a daze. Her house is filled top to bottom with stuff. I mean more stuff that you could ever imagine. I can't even describe how much stuff is in her house. Chairs, stools, handbags, statues, birdcages, typewriters, books, photography equipment, bottles, costume jewelry, plastic flowers, etc etc etc. There was a little path to two chairs in the living room where we sat and chatted. She seemed glad for the company and went on and on about old friends, life in the country and photographers whose work she admired. She was very interested in me-my heritage (I have found since that she asks everyone where their family originates), my children and my work. She especially enjoyed the fact that I stopped by because of the dreams. I learned later that she's a big believer in signs.

Since then I have often stopped by to visit her and to take her food. She is almost 89 and doesn't always eat as she should, so there are several of us who keep an eye on her and her kitchen. I also see her often at the local church dinners, art openings and other events. She doesn't always remember me at first, but a reminder that I am "the artist down the road" usually works and we pick up right where we left off the last time we visited. This last Saturday night I was her driver/escort to the annual "Victorian Stroll" held in Cooperstown. This is another one of those historical events that our seemingly perfect small town revels in, especially at the holidays. Normally this is the kind of event that makes me want to gag but everyone involved was so enthusiastic, I couldn't help but feel that way also. The main street was closed to traffic, was lit with candles, there were horse drawn carriage rides and a live Nativity scene. Because she has an extremely extensive collection of historical costumes she loaned many of them to the volunteers who dressed up and walked along the Main Street providing a glimpse of the past. Lady and I walked up and down the street and she stopped and spoke with everyone, And when I say everyone, I am not exaggerating. It took us an hour to walk two blocks and to take one of the carriage rides. Finally we settled into a table at the window of the Doubleday Cafe, with a perfect view of the the passersby. All of whom waved at Lady or came in and chatted with her. As the event wound down, we ate our dinner and chatted and she told me more about her past and how she came to live in upstate NY alone in 1960. It was a lovely evening and I really enjoyed it. Despite the fact that she constantly chided me for not wearing a hat. She can't understand why women don't wear hats anymore, insisting that men can't resist a woman wearing a hat. A bit of advice if anyone out there is looking for a man. Heh.

Anyway, she has the true spirit of an artist and while the photographs she takes have perhaps been spoiled by the similar kinds now taken at a booth in the county fair, her heart is in every photo she takes (and she still works, believe it or not) and they are really amazing to see and experience in real life. She spends a lot of time getting to know her subjects, discussing their family heritage, their hopes and dreams and how they see themselves. She then decides on costumes and puts together a scene, using the objects in her overstuffed home and barn.

Lady is also a reminder to me that I don't need a fancy studio (I know, I always complain about needing more space. I should stop.) or supplies. Every picture she takes is a set-up in her tiny, overcrowded front room-a table by a north facing window and 100 year old 4x5 camera (no flash) that cost her $50 at the Salvation Army, four feet away. She develops the film in her tiny, overcrowded bathroom and retouches the actual negative in her workspace which is a tiny, overcrowded closet.

I hope you will visit her website and read more about her. She really is an inspiration.

Beta, Schmeta

Just a quick note. I finally switched over to beta blogger and naturally, I am now unable to post a comment in my own comment section. So if you don't get a pithy response from me to your much appreciated comments, don't take it personally.

I am sure blogger will soon fix this little snafu in the the new fab system that they are heartily encouraging us to switch over to. Heh.

Update: So of course the very minute I posted this, my comment was accepted. But I am leaving this post up in case I am refused acceptance again at some point.

Chicken Update

#1 Rooster



#2 Rooster



At The Fence



Speckly's Head


So until today I have really enjoyed the chickens. Today it isn't so great. It's four degrees (I am not exaggerating), really windy and I nearly froze while doing my daily little chicken chores. I will spend the day worrying about them-they are cooped up inside their small chicken house and their water was frozen this morning. We may have to figure out a way to get an extension cord to the coop to at least put a warmer under their water.

Anyway, we started out with 27 little chicks back in early June. Over the summer, one of the white chickens developed an impacted crop and despite my efforts (days of holding the chicken upside down and pulling stuff out of its mouth), it ended up dying. In September, I gave five hens to our neighbors, whose flock had diminished slightly over the last few years.

We were left with 21 brown egg laying hens. Or so we thought. One morning while I was getting the kids out the door to the bus stop, we all thought we heard a suspicious crowing sound from the chickens. Over the next few days it developed into a distinctive rooster's crow. We were supposed to get layer hens but they missed a few obviously and we have not one but two roosters. They are beautiful though and so far have not given us any trouble. Everyone we know who has roosters says that they are trouble. Some friends of ours who got chickens around the same time as we did ended up with two roosters also and they caused such a problem that both of them have been "eliminated" from the flock. Anyway, one is in charge, but they both get a lot of action, if you know what I mean. Many lovely young ladies to choose from. I have heard that when they are about a year old they start to fight and if that happens, one of them may become a free ranger, And, well if something were to befall him, like a fast car or a coyote, so be it...We have had a few scuffles but they have been resolved quickly. A few weeks ago the #1 Rooster started to give me a hard time when I was in the chicken yard. He kept coming at me, jumping up at me and squawking. I kicked him (not that hard) in the chest and he backed off but still gave me attitude. So I called Penny, our killer dog (she's a sweetie, but has a tendency to hunt, kill and eat small animals, including birds), and she came in and sat inside the fenced yard with me and the chickens. This immediately chilled out the #1 Rooster and he hasn't given me a hard time since. Clearly I am #1. Well, along with Penny.

Some of the hens are more friendly with me than others. A few of them always come up to me and follow me around, two will let me hold them and one of them always unties my shoelaces. They all have their quirks and it is fascinating to sit and watch their activities. They seem to be stupid at first, but then you can see that there is a purpose in their actions and sometimes do very smart things. They are also amazingly perceptive.

We started getting eggs in September. At first there just a few each day and some of them were kind of wacky. They had soft rubbery shells that you could just tear open. Or they had wrinkly shells or were perfectly round instead of well, egg shaped. But those disappeared and we gradually collected more each day. Despite the short days and cold weather now, which affect egg production, we are getting around a dozen eggs a day. Clearly we can't eat that many, so basically we give a dozen eggs to anyone who stops by. Yesterday I gave a dozen to our dentist when I took one of the kids in for an appointment. Our neighbors are set as well. And the flavor of the eggs! It's amazing how tasteless and bland the store bought eggs are in comparison.

Raising chickens has been a really great experience. I have learned that I am capable of things that I never dreamed possible, like trying to save a dying chicken. heh. I love hearing the roosters crow, they are very polite and wait until dawn and it just seems perfect out here to have crowing roosters. We had a lot of company over the summer and the highlight of the visit for their kids was holding a chicken. It's surprising how many kids never have a chance to hold a chicken. Based on the success of this project, and because we have a real barn and 22 acres, we are actually considering getting a few goats and maybe even some sheep next year. So stay tuned!


Egg Scale

iPod Heaven

Summer Ski Run, 2006, Oil on Panel, 18x24







I had a lovely birthday yesterday and thanks so much to all of you for your good wishes. Doug and I went out for lunch, did a few errands and then I spent the afternoon in the studio. I feel lucky that my work isn't really work-on a day that I could justify taking off, I preferred to spend the afternoon doing what I love.

We had a nice dinner and then the gifts! My youngest daughter, the one who "borrows" every pen in the house (I once found, literally, 22 pens under her bed) gave me my very own special pen, one that she and everyone else promised not to steal from my desk. I also received a book, Fury by Salman Rushdie, and a vintage egg scale and egg carton (will show those in tomorrow's update on our chickens). My dear husband, after being hit on the head with my hints for the last six months gave me the new super deluxe tricked out iPod. It plays videos, not my favorite feature as I have a life that does NOT revolve around watching music videos on a 1.5x2 inch screen, but of course they all play the videos now. But the best part is that it will hold 20,000 songs! My old iPod (now a charming antique) only held 1,000 songs, which seemed like a lot at first but over the last year I found myself removing the music from CD's that I had downloaded in order to add new music. Now I can put Bob Dylan, U2 and Tom Waits back on! I have really liked having my music on an iPod for the last two years. The shuffle feature is great and since listening to music is a big part of my day, as well as crucial to my studio time, the convenience of the iPod has just been amazing.

Oh yeah, yellow cake with white frosting and big purple flowers. And ice cream. We were all in a sugar coma after.

42

Solid Red Barn, 2006, Oil on Panel, 18x24













On this day in 1964, the day I was born, KTVR TV channel 13 in La Grande, OR (PBS) began broadcasting.

On this day in 1969, four people died during a free concert given by the Rolling Stones at Altamont. One of the deaths was a stabbing that occurred near the stage. The three other deaths were accidental.

On this day in 1973, Gerald R. Ford was sworn in as the vice-president of the United States after vice-president Spiro Agnew resigned.

On this day in 1993, The Eagles taped a video for Travis Tritt's version of "Take It Easy" which led to their reunion (I love the Eagles).

The number one song in America the week I was born was Ringo, by Lorne Greene. Since that was a rather disappointing discovery especially since it was the year that the Beatles ruled the world, I'll add that the number one song that week after I was born was Mr. Lonely by Bobby Vinton. Not much better, unfortunately.

I share a birthday with the following people:

1421 Henry VI king of England (1422-61, 1470-71)
1843 Albert de Vriendt Flemish historical painter/etcher
1896 Ira Gershwin lyricist ('S Wonderful, I Got Rhythm)
1898 Alfred Eisenstaedt photo journalist
1904 Eve Denise Curie, French pianist/author/daughter of Madame Curie
1906 Agnes Moorehead Clinton MA, actress (Endora-Bewitched)
1913 Eleanor Holm New York NY, 100 meter backstroke swimmer (Olympics-gold-1932)
1920 Dave Brubeck, Concord California, jazz pianist/composer, Gates of Justice
1932 Don King Cleveland OH, boxing promoter (Muhammud Ali, Sugar Ray Leonard, Mike Tyson)
1941 Richard Speck mass murderer (killed 8 student nurses in 1966)
1948 JoBeth Williams Houston TX, actress (Kramer vs Kramer, Poltergeist)
1952 Terence Knox Richland WA, actor (Peter-St Elsewhere)
1953 Thomas Hulce, Plymouth, Michigan, actor, Amadeus, Equus, Echo Park
1955 Steven Wright droll comedian (Steven Wright Live)
1956 Peter Buck US pop guitarist (REM-Murmur)
1956 Randy Rhoads Santa Monica CA, rocker (Ozzy Osbourne-Flying High Again)
1963 Janine Turner Lincoln NE, actress (Maggie-Northern Exposure)
1971 Ryan Wayne White born with hemophilia, later to contract AIDS from blood-clotting products.
1971 Richard Krajicek Netherlands, tennis star (Wimbledon-1996)

I will spend the rest of today being pampered and catered to by my husband and children. The kids are always exceedingly happy when someone has a birthday. Mostly because of the cake, I suspect.

Snow! Finally.

Lavender Light, 2005, Oil on Panel, 5x7






So I did pretty well in the studio yesterday. I decided to stop thinking and worrying about my palette and just put the colors down that seemed right. It was great to have feedback from you guys about how my paintings don't seem to be green or yellow, that the dominant colors are the blues, pinks and purples. So thank you, because hearing that was extremely helpful.

I wouldn't say I was particularly productive however. I managed to get color down on two pieces, but I was distracted by a heated conversation on another blog. I behaved badly and out of character there and am terribly embarrassed about it, so I am not going to link it (I edited out my worst comment, anyway), but I have made my apologies and will be much more careful in the future. However, the distraction may have helped me a bit from obsessing on my color issues, so maybe it wasn't all bad. I sure felt awful last night though!

But today is a new day, and I have to say that I am very happy about the snow that has finally arrived. While it was nice to have such warm weather in November (which gave me endless opportunities to clean up my flower garden, none of which I took advantage of-they are still a mess) I felt uneasy about it as well. Like many, I have my suspicions about the strange weather patterns of late and so the delayed winter feels bittersweet to me. I was comforted this morning by the sound of the plow and the white reflective light coming through our windows. I am skipping the spin bike today. I will bundle up and go for a walk instead.

I am probably one of the only people in America who loves the shorter days and cold and snowy nights. I love to snuggle up in our softly lit farmhouse, eat dinner when it's dark and then curl up early in bed with the kids, talk, read and tuck them in. Then later I watch TV and knit or read, with the wind and snow blowing outside. I love all of that.

Incrementally Better

Yellow Sky at Dawn, 2006, Oil on Panel, 16x20







Thank you all so much for your wonderful words of encouragement, understanding and reassurance in response to my exceedingly depressing post on Friday. Oh, and the dose of reality from Chris was good too. Heh. Not to mention the great new ideas for imagery from Lauren, Chris and Lisa. Nudes in front of barns. Nude Chris in front of barns. Definitely an avenue for me to pursue....

As I mentioned in the comments, Doug had read my post while I was out doing an errand. Despite the fact that he had been out of town for 3 days and he had a pile of work waiting for him, he dragged me up to Utica to look at some art, in real life. Such a good guy. The Munson-Williams-Proctor Arts Institute is a fine arts center which has a really impressive collection of fine art, an arts education program and a performing arts division. We had heard much about their collection but had never taken the time to drive up there to see it. During the 40 minute drive we talked about my little breakdown and Doug asked me specific questions about what was going on when I get to the point of being blocked. I had to think about it a bit and then explain it to him so that he could understand, which actually really helped me understand things much better myself. I have been feeling as if I use the same colors in nearly every painting that I do. Specifically green and yellow. Even though I use about a hundred different kinds of greens and yellows, they are still pretty much just green and yellow. To me those seem like such realistic colors, especially when used on the land and foliage areas, and I since I don't really go for realism, it's really been creating a conflict for me. It was good to realize that, but I am still not sure what I will do about it. However, Doug assured me that he didn't feel that green and yellow were at all dominant in my paintings, that they were more the "work horse" colors. So I will be readjusting my beliefs about color and its placement and perhaps that will help me move forward again.

Anyway, the Arts Institute has a great collection and we really enjoyed looking through it. I'd say their prize piece is Number 2, 1949 by Jackson Pollock. It is one the drip paintings, painted on a very long piece of deep red sailcloth. It was displayed so that the back of it was visible and looking at that was almost more interesting than the front. There was an accompanying video playing that described the piece and recent restoration efforts, because as many of you know, Pollock's work has deteriorated quite a bit over the years due to the materials he used. The video spent a lot of time discussing Pollock's reasons for choosing the dark red surface, including the possibility that he was influenced by his western upbringing or his appreciation for Native American art. I was kind of thinking that maybe it was just a cheap piece of canvas that he had come across, but maybe that's just me. Other artist's work on display were Edward Hopper (a kind of mediocre landscape-but it had that light) Maurice Prendergast, David Smith, Andy Warhol, Philip Guston.

We got home right before the bus. And then my real life as a chauffer/mother took my mind off things. As did Saturday's activities which included timing at a swim meet, much careful scheduling to get everyone else where they had to go, baking cookies, and going to a real grown-up party that evening. Something we rarely do and which was great fun!

Sunday, I spent most of the day catching up on office stuff. I did a little painting, but not much. I didn't want to push it. I did work a bit on the last piece the I did and I didn't make it worse. So I will call that successful, for now.

I am keeping my fingers crossed about today's time in the studio.

The Real Meltdown

Light Beyond the Dark, 2006, Oil on Panel, 16x20







Well, folks, I have to admit that I am really struggling here. I know it'll pass, I know that I haven't permanently lost my ability to paint but right now it feels as if I can't do anything right. Actually, that's only partially true-the underpaintings I have done recently have been good. It's the color that has really been giving me a hard time. I just can't seem to get the colors right. I can't decide what to start with and I keep envisioning which color would come next-which paralyzes me. Normally I don't think that much when I am doing the color, but now I can't stop thinking. I feel as if I keep using the same colors over and over, even though I am not. I feel blocked when I sit down and look at all of my paint tubes to decide what to start with for the day. None of them look appealing to me lately.

To make it worse, of the seven images I sent to the gallery for approval, two were rejected (including the one above). I know they aren't awful, they just may not appeal to the director for whatever reason. And none of the new pieces will be included on the postcard. That image will be of a piece that is already in the gallery's inventory. It's a nice piece and it will look great. But still. The timing of all of this is just bad. I had a very unproductive day in the studio Thursday, only getting color onto one single, stupid painting. And I am really starting to feel the pressure to get this work finished and I am worried that I won't be able to pull it out of the bag, so to speak.

Now this is a true post show meltdown. Not the one I lightheartedly joked about a few weeks ago but the real one, the nasty one that strips me of all of my confidence and energy and vision.

But today is another day. And I will try again.

Exercise and Knitting

Shadowy Field, 2006, Oil on Panel, 12x16







I have a busy day planned today. First, I have to go do my stupid exercise for the day. I have slacked off on regular exercise in this past year, mostly because of my schedule and because it is the first thing to go when I get the slightest bit busy. Or if I have a hangnail. I was also just kind of burned out on it and it was easy to skip days, which turned into weeks and so on. However, it has really caught up with me lately as I am feeling horribly out of shape and my weight has been creeping up. So I have turned over a new leaf and have been managing to work out everyday for the last few weeks. I have been alternating between an hour on my spin bike/upper body weights and a 3 mile walk (with a lot of hills) each day and in a few weeks I'll start going to the gym for more weight training and Pilates and maybe an aerobics class once in awhile. Hopefully the variety will prevent the burnout again. Right.

I also have about five underpaintings that are ready for the color glazes and I really, really need to get going on them. So I am planning to work in the studio until it's time to pick up the kids at their various activities late this afternoon. Doug is in the city today so it's all up to me! Then dinner, chores, bedtime (for the kids), and then I'll spend a few hours knitting and watching a bit of TV. A few years ago I went completely overboard and bought tons of yarn. More than you can a imagine one person could ever own. Boxes and boxes and boxes. I have no explanation other than I wasn't really painting at the time so I had become completely obsessed with knitting and yarns. The textures and colors of the yarns and the process of making things really fulfilled my artistic needs, I suppose. In Utah, I used to knit things, mostly baby sweaters, and sell them but I don't have enough time for that now. Plus, everyone here seems to knit so there isn't much of a market. But I hope to use up all of my yarn in my lifetime so I continue to knit each night and make endless numbers of scarves and hats and sweaters for all of us and for anyone I know who has a baby.

Ok, so this has maybe turned into a real post. Phew! I thought it would be lame. heh.

By the way, the paintings that I have been posting this week are for the show in January at The Harrison Gallery.

Two Good Links

Cabins at Sunset, 2006, Oil on Panel, 12x16






My sneaky real life friend, Ashley, has started a blog, without telling me! She just casually left a comment on one of my posts, I followed her link and there she was, big as day! I met Ashley about two years ago and we instantly found that we have much in common. She is also an artist, wife and mother. And so whenever we have a chance to visit, which isn't often enough, we quickly discuss what we have been working on as well as compare notes on panels, subject matter, supplies, galleries etc. We have been in a number of local shows together and she had a really great show last year at the local gallery. I bought one of her pieces, she bought one of mine and I am eyeing the Batman piece, which you'll see when you go to check out her blog to welcome her to blogland.

I have been doing underpaintings the last few days. I have about seven pieces finished for the show (pending approval by the gallery director of course, so it could be less!) and so I am really getting back down to business this week. I know I keep saying that but this time I really mean it. heh. I did five 18x24 underpaintings on Monday. Since they weren't dry on Tuesday I was left with little to do, so after I wasted part of the day on the computer I did about six 8x10's. And today I am planning to do several 24x36 sized underpaintings. Normally, I don't do so many all at once, but I am just feeling like I should be starting as many as I can while I have the time and opportunity. On Thursday I should be able to start doing the glazes and I will go back to working in the usual batches of 4-6, leaving the rest to wait their turn. I think I will try to work through this weekend. Well, except for Saturday when our family has about 77 different things to do, such as a birthday parties, swim meets and a pancake breakfast/silent auction fundraiser.

I am going to leave you all with another link. My kids found this computer game and I knew a person with my history (blisters and missed deadlines from too much Tetris) should never play another computer game again, but I couldn't help it. This one is visually so beautiful and my kids are so great at it-how hard could it be? HA. I sat down to play it and fours hours later I thought maybe I should move so as not to get a blood clot in my leg. And my highest score was still much less than half of my son's best score.

So go and have fun, she said wickedly.

PS. I think the wires look like tapeworms. You'll see what I mean.

Absolute Arts

A Curve to the Left, 2006, Oil on Panel, 12x16






When I started to paint again, I knew that I should get a website. I bought my domain name, tracyhelgeson.com but had no idea about how to go about setting up a website. So I let that sit for awhile. Instead I decided to put my work up at Absolute Arts just so I would have a place on the web to send people to who were interested in seeing what my work looked like. It was easy to navigate, and I felt that most of the work there was of pretty good quality unlike some of the other art sites I had checked out.

I applied for a premiere portfolio, got it (though I suspect that anyone who can pay the fee can get one) and figured out how to upload images. It was really easy to manage even for a computer idiot like me and I was excited to see in my stats that my page got hundreds of hits each day. I could also tell which images were most (and least) viewed and a number of people, including my mother of course, and my aunt and uncle, and a few friends left notes in my message book.

With so many hits, I thought that surely I would sell some work, this was before I had some gallery exposure and so of course I was hoping to sell a few things, but that aspect was very disappointing. I received a lovely note from a woman in Nigeria who wanted six paintings, a dozen Panasonic cordless telephones, didn't care about the cost of shipping and wanted to pay with a cashier's check. Hmmm. Altogether, in two years I received three offers for paintings, all of them were substantially lower than the asking price (which really weren't that high to start with). I accepted two because they were for older pieces, but the last one was just too low and the buyer didn't accept my counter offer. I think there are many artists who sell a lot of work through Absolute Arts, but clearly I am not one of them. This experience helped show me that my work really should be seen in real life and that sales of my work would not be easy via the internet.

The positive things that happened as a result of my page on Absolute Arts was that two of my current galleries found me there. I don't know how, because there is a lot of art to wade through, but Glenn from Salt Meadow Gallery saw my work there and Thomas Deans in Atlanta found me there too. And it really was a great way to easily put up new work, so overall I am glad I did it. I should also add that the people who handle the sales were exceedingly nice and very professional. A big plus in my book.

However, things change and now that my membership is up for renewal, I have decided not to continue. It has gotten too difficult to keep track of what is there and frankly, between my .com site (which badly needs updating) and this blog I can't and don't want to keep up with it anymore. It seemed as if buyers always wanted a big discount and as my prices have gone up it seems more unlikely that I will ever sell anything there. And selling the work myself, even through AA, conflicts with the efforts of the galleries that now represent me.

For some reason the page is still up. They don't seem to be taking my silence to their renewal notices seriously, however I suppose it will close up soon. A good learning experience, one that I don't regret certainly, but one I am glad is over!

Google Searches

Windows, 2006. Oil on Panel, 12x16








We had a very nice, quiet Thanksgiving. The cooking went smoothly, with the exception of the the stupid turkey. Perhaps we were a little late getting it into the oven or perhaps it ALWAYS takes longer than the estimates according to the weight of the turkey suggest. So for whatever reason, we found ourselves eating at 7:30pm, which is dangerously close to my non functional time of the day. Despite that, we had fun and Doug and I enjoyed hearing what the kids are thankful for. Family, friends, our pets, and cheese (my son is kind of quirky) were some of the highlights.

On Saturday I spent some time going through the papers on my desk and came across a list of hits to my blog that result from google searches. I had been keeping track of them because they were so funny. I am sure that finding my blog as a result of some of these searches must have been a real disappointment. With the exception of the ones looking for me of course. heh.


Here are some of my favorites (they are exactly as entered-my comments are in parenthesis):

understanding men crabby (uh, yeah, good luck in figuring that out)

my husband works too many hours

oppressive & censored

seedy bookstore sex (I couldn't figure this one out so I looked it up-it linked to this post where I described artist Nan Goldin's work, thankfully it didn't refer to me because well, my mom reads this)

did hippies wear dreadlocks

boy tights (a result of mentioning that I put my son in tights for Halloween)

how to sew a magician's cape

mod podge (I sang its praises once)

woodstock (of course people are searching for my very favorite place!)

attending Raffi concert on broadway (ok, I am sure that I have NEVER mentioned Raffi, maybe concert made it come up)


A whole slew of hits looking for fellow bloggers and artists that I have mentioned and which are my best shot at getting repeat visits:

james wolanin

francis livingston (a lot of people are looking for him!)

wolf kahn

barns Wolf Kahn

steven larose

neil hollingsworth

harold hollingsworth


And relating to a post about art materials safety, the one where I discussed toxins in my studio:

safe to use turpentine while pregnant

liquin safety

turpentine, oil paint paranoia

toxin of oil, turpentine

underpainting

oil painting when pregnant


My discussion of a Paul Simon concert last summer still attracts many, many searches for:

paul simon in a turkey suit

saturday night live turkey suit

who wore turkey suit on snl (must be a youngster)

still crazy after all these years turkey

and endless other variations on that particular performance.


But the all time winner of the most mistaken hits to my blog resulted from my posts concerning the death of our hamster. Let me first say that I have been really shocked to learn that there are so many horrible health issues with hamsters. I thought we had it bad just because I had to trim Fluffy's teeth once a month. Sheesh. These poor people.

hamster funeral (I get tons of these)

lump on hamsters chest

odd growth on hamsters back

kids hamsters funerals

open sore hamster mouth

watery eyes hamster

growth on hamsters lip

can hamsters go blind (only if they masturbate, sorry couldn't resist:-))

And the best one, AND most disturbing:

hamsters butt is bleeding will it die (I am guessing yes)


So there you go. Clearly I should be talking more about art and artists instead of prattling on about dead hamsters and Paul Simon if I ever want to increase my return visitor stats.

Happy Thanksgiving!

View of Field from Route 20, 2006, Oil on Panel. 24x36




Something about having this blog makes me write about the whole history of my life, especially when a holiday rolls around. So here is my lament about Thanksgiving and the truce I have made with it in recent years. And an image of a recent painting that has no connection to any of that whatsoever.

I don't have any specific recollections of Thanksgiving dinners as a kid. I am sure we had a few family dinners at least, but I have a very small extended family and for whatever reason, the past holidays are not very memorable to me. When I was a teen I spent a few years living with a friend of mine and boy, did her family celebrate Thanksgiving! She had a huge family, with many aunts and uncles and cousins. Everyone gathered at her grandmother's tiny little brown house and I bet there were fifty people at every holiday meal, all of the tables were extended and every card table in sight was used. It was all very traditional. The women cooked and cleaned up after, while the men sat, smoked, belched and watched football. And the food! Tons of it-all dripping with animal derived saturated fat! I loved it. But the best part was just hanging around and playing cards and other games before and after the dinner. I was treated as if I belonged to their family, complete with teasing insults and a place at the adult table.

In college I never went home for the holidays, as I usually couldn't afford the travel expenses. So I spent most of those Thanksgivings at Dirty Franks in Philadelphia. The bar was always open on the holidays and it was a wonderful place for all of us lonely pathetic types. I met some of the most interesting people on those nights and the environment was perfect for an artist who thought she needed that lifestyle in order to be a true artist. heh. Those were my melodramatic years.

When I met Doug I thought that that would be my chance to celebrate the holidays with a big loving family, all happy to see each other on Thanksgiving and Christmas and Passover (Doug is Jewish. I am not). Alas, it was not to be. While Doug had a large family when he was a kid and they had great holiday celebrations, by the time I met him the dynamics had completely changed. His family was smaller and had become a bit fractured (it was almost exactly like the movie Avalon, if you have ever seen that). Anyway, I spent several torturous Thanksgiving meals with his dad (who I loved and enjoyed) and evil stepmother and her family. The stepmother filled the day with passive aggressive manipulations and by the end of the day I didn't know if I was coming or going. She also was into plastic surgery and so every time I saw her she looked different, which was really disturbing. The food was also scary. Dry and overcooked (she had a tendency to microwave everything after cooking it in the oven) and unrecognizable. One year we were late because of a bad snowstorm and by the time we had arrived (about 2 hours late), they had already eaten and cleaned up everything. It was like there had never had been a dinner at all. That was the last time we went there, because we moved to Utah soon after and then Doug's father died the next year.

In Utah, the holidays were really really hard at first. We both felt so sad for many years that, for a variety of reasons, we were unable to celebrate Thanksgiving with anyone in either of our families. But we made lots of babies and pretty soon we had our own respectable sized crowd (six!) for a good holiday party. And finally now, I love that Thanksgiving is just our day together. Doug and I quibble every year about what size the turkey should be and where the roaster is and which plate did we use last year for the bread. We cook a very traditional Thanksgiving meal, with turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, peas and, rolls and pumpkin pie. I do all of the baking the day before, he does the turkey and potatoes and I make the stuffing. We put a nice tablecloth on the dining room table, use cloth napkins, light the candles and the kids get to drink sparking cider from the good wine glasses. The kids laugh, help, whine, argue, and insult each other at dinner, but no food is thrown on this day, and we all talk about what we are thankful for.

It's perfect.

Excellent Weekend!

House with Pink Hedge, 2006, Oil on Panel, 6x6









First I'd like to point out how utterly lame I am. Doug and I went to the opening at Anderson-Soule Gallery Friday night and despite the fact that I actually carried my camera in my hand to the event, I completely forgot to take any pictures whatsoever. Sheesh! I specifically intended to take a few shots for the blog, since I have forgotten to do so at almost every other opening I have attended since I started this blog. Doug may also qualify as lame since I had asked him to take pictures and he also forgot about it. We are just magical together. heh.

Anyway, the opening was very nice. We arrived just before 6pm (it had started at 5pm) and there were already a lot of people there and it was downright crowded the rest of the evening. Doug and I spent a lot of time talking with Richard Gombar, the artist who also participated in the other show, Old Barns/New Perspectives. He and I spent some time comparing art notes (one of my favorite things when I talk to other artists) about our little gallery scene, our studios and family life. Turns out that he and Doug have the same dorky sense of humor and so I spent a lot of time rolling my eyes at them. It was interesting to see my work again. It had been two months since I had sent it off to the gallery and so it felt as if I was seeing old friends, a lovely experience and a nice surprise about how good they still look. In fact, as we were approaching the gallery, I could see a painting that looked really interesting and that was the first one I went to look at when we got inside. It turned out to be one of mine and I felt silly about forgetting my old friend! Well, it was that and I probably need a new prescription for my glasses also. A few of the pieces in the show had sold, including one of mine. So that was a nice surprise too.

We stayed in Concord and the next morning, decided to drive to Portsmouth, as neither of us had ever been there. It was so great! We spent all afternoon walking around and visiting all of the little shops and galleries in the downtown area. We came across two galleries that had some interesting work and in fact one of them, Nahcotta, was a gallery that I had submitted my work to a few years ago (got a very polite no) and I was excited to see some work by a few of their artists (MJ Blanchette and Tim Beavis) that I had admired online. The other gallery, Three Graces, had some work by a painter, Brian Chu whose work we really liked. It was kind van Gogh-ish, the paint was very thick and directional but the images seemed more abstract (in person, somehow, they looked more abstract than they do in the reproductions-interesting quality, I'd say!) and the colors were fairly subtle. We came across a hotel within walking distance of all of this and decided to stay another night and so we checked in and then kept on shopping. It was nice to see so much merchandise, in person. I do so much of my shopping online these days, because there are so few stores (it's all baseball tourist crap mostly) where we live and so I really enjoyed this. Doug HATES shopping, some of our biggest arguments have happened in stores-he gets all tense and then I get mad because he is sucking all of the fun out of my very favorite thing (spending money) and then we argue/ignore each other, but this time he held it together really well and we had a great time. We also came across a really great shoe store and we both bought shoes. They can be kind of tricky to buy mail-order so this was pretty exciting to us upstate farm folks to be buying shoes in a real store. Yee-haw!

Despite the fact that there were tons of really good restaurants in Portsmouth, we ended up staying in the hotel for the evening, as neither of us felt like going out again. We ordered a really good pizza from room service and watched Little Miss Sunshine, which I highly recommend, by the way. It was excellent, funny and quirky and painful all at the same time. We drove back home on Sunday and got back in time to enjoy the fabulous dinner that our sitter, Mary Jo and our kids had prepared.

No more post show meltdowns for me anymore. Today I have to get it together and start getting some work finished (I have not been particularly productive the last few weeks)! I also need to take some time each day to get some exercise-which is one of the things I have neglected with my busy schedule this last year and boy, I am I feeling the effects of that! So I am off for a long walk and will then spend the rest of the day painting.

Reevaluation

Rock Face, 2006, Oil on Panel, 16x20








I didn't post yesterday as the kids had a half day of school and I wanted to make some progress in my studio (which I did-I nearly completed a pretty nice 24x36 landscape) in the morning. Sometimes I can still work in the afternoon if they are home, but I had promised them a movie so we went off to see "Flushed Away" as soon as they got home. It was definitely one of the better kid movies that I have had to suffer through, with all kinds of humorous references just for the adults. There was a whole thing about the singer Tom Jones and my kids sure had no idea why it was so funny that the singer had a pair of panties land on his face.

Now that things have calmed down a bit for me, art wise, that is, I have been reevaluating my future goals as well as what I did this last year that was fulfilling, challenging and successful. And what wasn't. I have decided to streamline my gallery representation as I have found myself a bit too scattered in the last six months and even though it all worked out ok, I feel that there were some negative effects on my personal life. While I don't mind giving up a few things temporarily when working to meet a deadline, giving them up nearly constantly is just too much and has given me a nagging, bad and guilty feeling, which I don't care for at all. So I have left two of my galleries, which while I won't specifically discuss here, I will say that I have made the utmost effort to end the relationships on a positive note, and leaving the door open to future opportunities. I struggle with feeling guilty about leaving (I have a tendency to take on guilt about nearly everything that happens, it's one of my little "issues"), however I know I am making the right decision for myself on both a personal and professional level. I have also decided to close my site at Absolute Arts (it is still up, but they keep telling me it will close soon because my membership has expired) which I will talk about in a future post. It is really difficult to make these kinds of decisions, but is an inevitable part of working as an artist.

Friday night is the fifth (and final) gallery reception for me for the month of November. This is the opening for the White Mountain School Revisited show at Anderson-Soule Gallery and Doug and I are driving to NH on Friday and will return on Saturday, or possibly Sunday as our sitter just so happens to be available for the whole weekend.

Concord, NH is not too far from Boston (Yoo-hoo! Jeff Hayes! I am talking to you!) so if you are in the area, stop by.

Anderson-Soule Gallery
Two Capital Plaza, North Main Street
Concord NH
Friday, November 17
5-8pm

My Very Worst Show Ever (So Far Anyway)

Hay Bales with Purple, 2006, Oil on Panel, 18x24






I think now is a good time to tell the story about the very worst show experience I have ever had. It's a good time to tell it because I feel myself getting all overly self confident (which is an unnatural and uncomfortable state of being for me) about having had a pretty good run of shows and sales in the last few months. When I start to feel too confident I usually pull out the rejection letter file and recall the first show that I had after we moved to upstate New York.

Within about six months of starting to paint again, I felt absurdly confident about what I was doing, enough so that I had invited a local art gallery director to my studio (she scheduled me for a show) and sent in an application for a show at a nonprofit arts org in a neighboring town. Each year this org. sends out a call for artists and from that pool of applicants they schedule shows for the upcoming year. Often two or three artists who don't know each other are put into one exhibition based upon their art and how it relates visually or conceptually.

I was accepted and given a two person show with another girl, D. And when I say girl I mean that literally. I was paired up with a girl who had just graduated from high school and was leaving for art college the weekend after the opening was scheduled. Nothing like showing with a young and talented girl to make me feel old and ridiculous. Great. And not only that but the show was scheduled for the same month as the one other show that I had lined up. So I would have to prepare for both at the same time.

As is my tendency I painted many paintings for this show (for both shows actually) and went to deliver them to the arts org. D. had not delivered her work yet and there was some question as to whether she was finished with anything or not. She did manage to bring in five large paintings a day later and so the show was hung.

I had handed out postcards for the show, left stacks of them at area businesses etc. but since we were pretty new to the area I didn't hold out a lot of hope that anybody I knew would be at the opening. And I was right. I knew not one single person at the opening (except for Doug), I had the worst headache ever (I had neglected to wear my mouth guard the previous night and when I am nervous or stressed I clench my jaw at night which gives me major headaches) and when we arrived I found that D's prices were about one quarter of what mine were and that she had already sold two pieces. The opening was fine I guess, a good turnout, although I inadvertently made eye contact with a guy who then followed me around all evening, insisting that my paintings were profound (he was also interested in Doug's work and called him about a hundred times in the following weeks asking him to get involved in various lame projects-he was such a pest and it took months to get rid of him politely), and D's high school friends, looked at me as if I were a parent-yikes-when I hugged D and wished her luck at school. The people that we enjoyed talking to most were D's parents, who were, as I had suspected they would be, exactly my age. Fabulous...

Anyway, during the show I sent various people down there and it turned out that almost none of them had been able to catch the gallery when it was open. Seems that it had very limited hours, like two half days a week. The one friend of mine who was able to be there during those hours stood in an empty gallery for about ten minutes waiting for someone to come and help her. No one ever showed up and she told me that had she been the type she could have cleared the place out. And then about a week before the show was to end I called to find out which day I needed to pick up my work. The gallery director, as usual, was not in and I spoke to the president of of the org. who informed me that they had to sand and stain the wood floor in the gallery that week so a) the gallery would be closed and b) I couldn't get my work until the following week. She was actually rude to me when I asked if I could get my work before they did the sanding. She never once apologized for the situation, had obviously never planned to call me to let me know about the work to be done and to maybe give me the option if getting my work out beforehand. Finally, I went to pick up the work (it all had a good layer of dust on it-clearly no one thought about protecting the art on the walls WHILE THEY WERE SANDING DOWN THE FLOORS) and none of my work had sold. This did not surprise me since the girl who was working in the gallery had her head down on the desk and was sound asleep when I went in to pack up the paintings. It really was the perfect ending to the whole experience.

The next day I made it clear to the gallery director, who had been strangely out of the loop the whole time, that I was not pleased with how the show had been handled. She was very apologetic, and I appreciated that but the woman who had been rude to me never did call me or anything like that. So I have not continued to support the org in any way since then. I have heard that they have alienated many local artists with their disorganization and unprofessional behavior and I now know many artists who refuse to show there at all.

I know that working with a non profit organization can be risky, as they are always short of funds, volunteers and staff, and that the people who ARE there are often burned out and overworked, but since that experience I have shown in several more non profit arts orgs and they have all been absolutely wonderful to work with. So luckily, this was an isolated experience for me as well as the only show (with the exception of a few group shows) where absolutely none of my work sold.

By the way, many of those paintings are definitely cringe-worthy to me now, but several were really nice and I later sold about five or six of them. Our neighbors down the road bought on of the best ones, pictured below. The photo isn't so great but you get the idea.

Weekend Update

Vivid Hillside, 2006, Oil on Panel, 6x6










The trip to Concord, NH last Thursday was nice but fairly uneventful. It is a five hour drive and I was a bit concerned because the mapquest directions had about 743 maneuvers, so I was sure that I would get lost or perhaps get into an accident while trying to figure out where to turn next. But the drive went very smoothly. I did however see way too many houses decorated for Christmas. Can I at least finish up the Halloween candy and enjoy Thanksgiving before I have to start stressing about all of that Christmas crap?! The other thing I found out was that my night vision isn't as bad as I had thought. It's just that I need some light to drive by, Heh. I was worried about driving around an unfamiliar city at night but it turns out that other places actually have street lights! Where we live it is pitch black at night, so naturally I was starting to feel as if I couldn't see too well.

The opening was interesting. It was an open house/grand opening for the building that had been renovated and the public was invited. I arrived a bit late so I missed the speeches and ribbon cutting ceremonies, but I had a chance to speak with Trish from Anderson-Soule Gallery, who I don't see too often. I was also able to spend a few minutes talking to one of the other artists, Richard Gombar. I was intrigued by his work and I especially liked this painting of his:















The art, despite being hung in a hallway (not usually my favorite venue, I must admit) looked really nice and I am quite pleased that there will be original art continuously displayed in the lobby area as well as in an attached board room. I would have liked to have seen spotlights on the work, however the ceiling lighting (I suspect the bulbs were daylight type bulbs) did a pretty good job and perhaps more lighting will be installed at a later date. One thing that I did notice was that my paintings were actually pretty nice! I was in such a rush and so burned out when I painted them, that I could hardly remember what they looked like. So it was nice to have a chance to look at them again more closely and see that I really did do a good job with the colors, the texture and the edges. I don't specifically recall doing all of that!

I enjoyed a quiet evening in my hotel room watching tv (uninterrupted!) and having room service, which was maybe the worst meal ever. But someone else prepared it and someone else cleaned up after, so I am not complaining. As I was getting ready to leave the next morning, I was looking through the local paper that had been left outside my door. On the front page of the local section were several photographs of the renovated building and some of the activities there and the photograph of one of my paintings jumped right out at me! My name was included and the color photo looked pretty good so that was a nice ending to my time in Concord.

I took my time getting home, stopping at several places and buying Vermont syrup and cheese and that sort of thing. And when I was near home I stopped at two places that have rows of run down cabins. There was beautiful late afternoon sunlight on them and I took tons of photographs that I will use as reference for some new work. I drive past those cabins all of the time and have always been infatuated with them, but this was the first time that I had the time and energy to stop, not to mention the perfect light and I am excited about getting to work on these images.














However, my eventful weekend was just beginning! As soon as I got home Doug and I went into town to pickup the kids at the gym and then went off to an opening at the local arts org, where I had a few pieces displayed. As I have said before, I don't sell too much of my work locally anymore, but it is always fun to go to these openings and spend some time chatting and socializing with our friends. So we had a good time.

Saturday morning I had to get up at 6am in order to drive an hour and a half to take my daughter to her first swim meet, which turned out to be pretty much an all day affair. She had three races and although I had taken my knitting along, I ended up chatting with the some of the other mothers and walking back and forth between the pool and the cafeteria where everyone was waiting until it was time for their races.

By the time I got home I was SO sick of driving, but I did want to go to an opening in Saratoga Springs (two hours away) if Doug was going to drive us of course. And I thought it would be pretty cool to go to three opening receptions in one weekend. But alas, our sitter had to leave and we couldn't go. So instead I sat down to knit, which I seldom have time for anymore, and promptly fell asleep with two cats on my lap. Heaven!



PS, The opening reception we had hoped to go to, but missed on Saturday night was the opening for Significantly Small #2, a small works show at Gallery 100 in Saratoga Springs. I have 2-4 pieces in the show so if anybody is in the area, go and check it out. Last year's show was excellent and I am sure this year's is as well.

Tonight...

Back of the Barn, 2006, Oil on Panel, 6x6











.....I am feeling pretty full of myself. It hasn't been officially confirmed yet, but according to Carrie Haddad's website (which I have been checking, because we all know that it is a jinx to be calling the gallery to find out if anything has sold yet), this piece has been sold. It is the largest and most expensive piece I have sold yet and naturally I am quite pleased about it.

Tomorrow, however, it will be back to reality because the big plan is to do the underpaintings that I didn't get to last week before I left on my trip to NH (more about the trip on Monday) so I have something to work on this coming week and then clean out the attic which is a horrible mess OR pull out the weeds in the back flower garden if the weather is ok.

But until then I will be walking around the house like I am the best chick artist ever. heh.